The Shadow Is Not Your Enemy. It Is the Part You Buried

In my work as a coach and shamanic practitioner, I meet shadow aspects almost every day. I always tell people the same thing: these are the parts of our personality we have neglected because, at first glance, they are not pleasant to look at. But when they are turned toward and nurtured, they reveal themselves as some of the truest treasures we carry. Shadow work is not about defeating a dark part of yourself. It is about reclaiming what you exiled.

The term shadow comes from the psychology of Carl Gustav Jung, and it names the aspects of ourselves we have repressed into the unconscious — usually because they did not fit our self-image, our values, or the expectations of the people around us. Repressed does not mean gone. These aspects keep influencing our behaviour, our relationships, and whether we reach our goals, very often without our noticing.

This is where NLP and shamanism meet, and why I use them together. Both offer a way in to unconscious material, from different directions. NLP provides tools like parts work and timeline techniques, which open a dialogue with a repressed aspect or help trace when it first formed. Shamanic journeying and working with power animals, meanwhile, create a symbolic space where you can meet these parts of yourself safely and directly. Used together, the two allow a genuine integration of shadow aspects — and integration, not eradication, is what leads to real healing and a stronger sense of wholeness.

What Is a Shadow?

First and most importantly: we all have shadows. They are nothing extraordinary. There are simply parts of ourselves we would rather not look at in daylight — out of shame, fear, or insecurity. Left unacknowledged, these repressed parts influence us from below the surface, and they tend to surface either as inner conflict or as projection onto other people.

Projection is, in my view, one of the main causes of suffering in the world. It is so much easier to look for the darkness outside ourselves than to recognise and heal it within, isn’t it? Especially in shamanic work, I frequently see shadow aspects unconsciously projected onto others, and the result is misunderstanding, tension, and a stalling of the person’s own development. Anyone who practises shamanism has to take this seriously: it is essential to take responsibility for your own shadow and to learn to integrate it consciously.

Crucially, the shadow is not limited to the traits we call negative — anger, fear, jealousy. It also holds suppressed positive potential: creativity, strength, courage we were never allowed to express. These hidden aspects show up as resistance, as blockages, as the same pattern repeating in our relationships and decisions. Many people are unaware not only of their weaknesses but of their strengths. Recognising and integrating both the dark and the hidden-light aspects of the shadow is a powerful step toward inner peace and real growth. This is the same terrain Jung mapped, and if you want the fuller picture of where psychology and shamanic practice overlap, I have written about Carl Jung and the shamanic tradition separately.

The Role of Diagnosis in Shadow Work

Shadow work begins with recognition. In my practice I use tools like the ecology check from NLP to notice when a hidden aspect is at play. For example, when a client pursues a goal that is shadowed by unpleasant feelings or quiet hesitation, that hesitation is very often a shadow aspect making itself felt.

To identify shadows clearly — and to avoid confusing them with external circumstances or other people — precise diagnostic methods matter. In my shamanic practice I use specific divination techniques to reach a deep understanding of a client’s unconscious processes.

One example is the Mongolian stone oracle — a method that cannot be learned from a book. Such knowledge is passed only from teacher to student within shamanic traditions, often over many years. It asks for an intensive connection to the spiritual realms and the ability to read the oracle’s messages clearly and precisely. These tools do more than uncover shadow aspects; they offer clear answers and pathways for integration, illuminating blind spots and helping prevent us from projecting our own material onto others.

An Example From My Coaching Practice

A client I will call Lisa (name changed) came to me because she wanted to become more visible in her career but could not move forward. She knew exactly which steps were required — and simply could not take them.

In parts work, an inner part emerged that associated visibility with danger, shaped by childhood experiences in which standing out had led to criticism. Through a shamanic journey, she met this part in the form of a protective figure that symbolised loyalty to her family. With gentle reframing, we developed a new perspective: visibility was no longer “standing out” but “building bridges” to help others. The shadow aspect was integrated, and Lisa began pursuing her professional goals with a new sense of security and authenticity. The protective figure ultimately revealed itself as a lion, which now supports her in walking her path with courage.

Responsibility in Shamanic Practice

Anyone who practises shamanism carries a particular responsibility, both to themselves and to others. Shadow work requires knowing your own material and refusing to project it onto clients or your environment. That, in turn, demands regular self-reflection through divination and shamanic practice.

One of my teachers, who lives in Mongolia, once put it exactly right: “The greatest danger in spiritual work is truly projection. Your mind must be free of all your own issues so that you can work safely with people.” Only through clear diagnosis and continuous work on our own shadows can we, as practitioners, work authentically and powerfully. Integrating these aspects strengthens not only our relationship with ourselves but our ability to help others in their own healing — which is why shadow work sits so close to the deeper, and sometimes heavier, terrain of trauma work with shamanism.

Shadow Work with NLP and Shamanism: Questions People Ask

What is shadow work?

Shadow work is the process of recognising, meeting, and integrating the parts of yourself you have repressed — both difficult emotions like anger or fear and suppressed strengths like creativity or courage. The aim is not to get rid of these parts but to bring them back into conscious relationship, which reduces inner conflict and the tendency to project onto others.

How do NLP and shamanism work together in shadow work?

They approach the unconscious from two directions. NLP offers structured tools — parts work, timeline techniques, ecology checks — to dialogue with a repressed aspect and trace its origin. Shamanic journeying offers a symbolic space to meet that aspect directly, often as a figure or a power animal. Combined, they allow both the insight and the felt, experiential integration that lasting change needs.

Is shadow work dangerous or safe to do alone?

Gentle shadow work — noticing projections, journalling, meeting a part with curiosity — can be done alone. But when the material is heavy or trauma-related, it is wiser to work with a qualified practitioner or therapist. Shadow work can surface strong feelings, and the point is integration with support, not forcing everything open unaided.

How do I know I am projecting my shadow onto someone?

A reliable clue is a reaction out of all proportion to the event — someone irritates or fascinates you far more than the situation warrants. That disproportion often marks a disowned part of yourself you are seeing in them. Bringing it back to yourself, rather than acting on the judgement, is where the real work begins.

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